Four months have passed and not a flash of inspiration in sight. Totally frustrated and growing tenser by the minute. It takes the slightest thing for me to lose my focus. There is the constant tension in my neck and ears, and the only thing that seems to stop it is when I withdraw from daily activities.
My mind is cluttered with issues I have to deal with. I feel sometimes like I am dragged along daily by the needs of others. My creative juices are dripping slowly, and I manage to keep some level of sanity with a few pages of writing and thinking on a morning. Maybe it will end up as a book.....and then sit as bytes and data in my computer for three years like the other one.
I definately need a detox. I need to withdraw from people for a week or two and allow my mind to wander aimlessly until I reach the point of no thought at all. That's when all the images begin to flash in my brain.
So my "no books" for one month isn't going so well. I was hoping to ease the thought clutter by not reading as much. Instead, I have found myself being sucked into the mundane concerns of the media which I am exposed to be virtue of my job........I get sucked into debates which I would have normally just passed by with a smile. I must get back to reading.....it keeps me sane. Nothing like a healthy dose of Terry Pratchett to slap you out of reality.
My mind seems to be like a restless horse, jumping at every suggestion of a command. I have been Puppetized......... and I do not hold my own strings anymore.
On the good side...I will yank them back....." They are mine! Damn you world." and cut this silly cycle. My Creative brain is needed and I may actually get a chance to prime it for thought...good thought, progressive thought..........
I look forward to it.........