Samantha Rochard

My creative process.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Stillness


Its not a painting, but it surely reflects how I feel. Anyone who has ever watched a coconut bobing in a pool of river water, knows it doesn't go far. I feel like a floating nut. Going no where. I could describe the feeling with the rune I....the rune for standstill.
I feel boxed in all around me. Boxed in by demands on my time. I feel boxed in by demands for my thinking, my creativity and my space. Not to mention the lack of information flow. There are so many blocks on my computers at home and work that I am frustrated everytime I turn any machine on.
Imagine the pain of losing your entire digital portfolio. Imagine not being able to write your feelings. Imagine not being free to think about what you want...but to be told what you need to focus on.... my freedom is gone, and I was up last night unable to sleep because of the deep anguish I felt. I cried.
Its very difficult to let my mind wander these days........
But this does something to me. I must grieve...the action takes the pain away and clears a path to be filled with new resolve. I will begin again. This time I will refine my product, create a new website with the new paintings. I have been reading some email marketing, and blog marketing skills, and I am ready to execute a new strategy.
There are limits to using free sites, but thats all I can cope with for now. The credit card is maxed out.
This was supposed to be a spirit soaring blog.....I am sorry all. Its now a blog of despair.

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